Who is the ULTIMATE 80s Horror Hunk? Boner Eighteen: Kurt Russell vs. Gregory Harrison

I'm two days behind.  Don't judge me.  Perhaps I wanted a little more time w/ Bruce and David.  What of it?

Speaking of those two hunks --

With a promising THREE votes, I'm sad to say that "unknown" David Beecroft, of the last battle, was unable to overcome Bruce Campbell and his SIX votes.  But 50% less than the victor, that's not too shabby, considering Campbell's stature.  So Bruce Campbell moves on to the second round of battles.  Congrats, Bruce!

Our eighteenth battle (we're getting mighty close, folks) gives us two for real sex symbols.  Thus the title of this boner bout will be, "Honest to God Sex Symbols".  As I've said before, these titles just come to me.  Some brilliant spark from the heavens above.  It's a friggin' miracle, it is.  :)

First up is Mr. Kurt Russell.  We'll be focusing our attentions on THE THING, John Carpenter's terrifying remake from 1982.  And I'll put this out there right from the get-go -- we're also using Russell in two other Carpenter flicks (although not horror per se), mostly because Russell is either shirtless or sleeveless most of the time.  We're talking ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK and BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA.  However, with his character's icy location in THE THING, he's in parkas, long underwear (which can be sexy -- if on Russell of course) and a full on THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN Bigfoot beard.  So we don't get the skin we all know we want.  But, THE THING is all horror (with some sci-fi of course), and Russell is all man.  I'd like to take some time to say how sexy it is to have all of these men (before the events of the film begin) living life in an all-male society, and the thoughts of how they deal w/ all of those manly urges, but then I think of some of the old farts sharing this space w/ Russell and Keith David.  We got some Wilford Brimley and some Donald Moffat and a bevy of other younger -- not quite do-able -- character actors...so not really the treasure trove of sexy possibilities existing in this "men locked up together for many months" fantasy world.

But there's still Russell.  He's got those blue eyes to match the blue cold of Antarctica, the very manly beard and in every one of his pictures, that flowing long hair you'd like to grab from behind and... well, you know where this is going.  The first picture above is him in THE THING.  The second one is a shirtless pic of him from ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK as Snake Plissken (the ultimate hot bad-ass).  I've always taken extra time to examine that snake tattoo, each time the film is viewed.  Oh where my imagination takes me when pondering to what unknown and forbidden territory, the end of the snake would take me.  Smelling salts at the ready, if you please.

And the final photo for Russell is from BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA.  This shot perfectly captures his lickable chin, appetizing stubble and just all around pretty boy features.  He's adorable and sexy at the same time.  Not everyone can pull that off.  I've only seen BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA once, and I know it's a sin that I don't particularly like it.  The thing is, I saw it way past my 80s movie viewing heyday.  Films from that era, which I saw during that era, regardless of how bad they are, still hold the quality of nostalgia.  While BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA is now considered a cult classic, my mid 2000s first viewing didn't do much for me -- aside from the raging boner I experienced when seeing Kurt Russell in his muscle shirt!  (too vulgar?  well, these are called boner battles after all, so lighten up, you prudes!)  :)  Kurt Russell, everyone!

Speaking of boners, Russell's competitor for this battle -- well, let's just say he may be the SEXIEST MAN ALIVE, 80s horror or not!  I'm talking about Gregory Harrison (I already know my husband will vote for him, since Harrison is his #1 hunk of all time).  I was hesitant to include Harrison in this battle, only because the majority of the hunks I'm throwing into the ring, are guys I grew up watching and adoring and salivating over and... you get the idea.  Harrison's film which earned him a place in this competition, is the underrated and truly amazing Australian horror film, RAZORBACK.  Don't let the fact that it's about a giant killer boar deter you.  Visually, it's a remarkable picture.  And the lead actor is our hunk du jour, Gregory Harrison.  So the first pic I'm giving you is from the film in question (look at him, all sweaty and dirty and banged up -- let me cater to your wounds), but the other ones are from his heyday in the 80s, mostly as one of the lead doctors on TRAPPER JOHN, M.D.

This man was (IS, I saw him at a film festival a few years ago, and even with the grey hair and stunning grey beard of the current him) amazingly gorgeous beyond anything on this earth.  He's absolutely delicious.  Great head of hair, uber-nummy and perfect face and a hairy body to simply die for.  (who will I be voting for on this one -- hmmm).  But back to my original thought, RAZORBACK didn't enter my visibility until the late 90s.  I'd heard of it, but never had the chance to view it.  So Harrison's presence here is sort of out of line w/ the rest of the hunks.  I hadn't been fawning over him for years and years, at least not for this film.  So it's not unfair per se, since he is in an 80s horror film, but he wasn't one of my early horror hunk loves.  But Lord God, I would run over my own mother for a chance to do this guy.  Seriously.  I mean SERIOUSLY, check that shit out (and the film too).

Clearly, I'm gonna have to vote for Harrison, but it deeply pains me to leave Russell behind, cuz he's one of my all time faves... and like Harrison, he's aged very well.  This is a toughie (shut up, I know I've said this before).  But to really hit home how hard it is to make a choice on this, I've just put someone else's sexiness ABOVE effing Snake Plissken.  Ouch!  Does that properly illustrate the difficulty of this one?

Cast your vote, if you possibly can.  You have my sympathies.