I just don't know...

...what to think about the whole Virginia Tech tragedy. I'm angry about so many things. I can't put into words (although I'm obviously trying to) how I feel. I don't know yet. I'm already tired of hearing about this on the news. Not because the victims and survivors don't deserve their moment and to have their stories told. That's not it at all. I'm just so tired of bad news in general. This is clearly one of the biggies of the past few days. I'm disgusted that his odd, clearly psychotic behavior was pushed aside; not addressed or stopped. I just can't believe that nothing more drastic was done. I'm angry (much like I felt after Columbine) that these killers took their own lives once they completed their task. I can't say anything more than "they were wimps". I know that sounds odd, but that's what I want to say. It pisses me off (what does that mean?) that they don't have the balls to stick around and face the conseqences. I said this after Columbine. These killers were taunted/teased throughout their high school career. I'm sure that Cho Seung-Hui had issues of a similar nature; especially considering his obvious persecution/paranoia issues. You know what, I had a very shitty time dealing w/ pseudo gay-bashing (before I was even out) and constant BS from classmates when I was in high school. By the time I graduated; a few of my friends and I had to eat lunch in a classroom. Did I have ill wishes toward these people? Of course. Did I follow through on those ill wishes? Obviously not. Did I use this torment/pain to move me along in my life and give me a thicker hide. Absolutely. Also, how did the roomate(s) not find it odd to never hold a conversation w/ their flat-mate? I don't get this? I'm also infuriated that the campus allowed classes to continue after the first shooting. What kind of stupidity is that? The other half said, "wouldn't they err on the side of being overly cautious?" That seems to make sense to me. My jaw also dropped at the media's "worst shooting in US history" label; so quickly. Maybe these news folks knew all of this off hand, but I pictured someone quickly doing research on line to find out where it ranked. That's sensationalism. One of the final gripes on this issue...gun control. Monday night, on the opening of some news program (I don't recall which one), the host stated that he would have guests w/ a pro gun position and guests w/ a con gun position. Pardon my French, but who the FUCK would argue for gun rights on a day like Monday. WHO? This whole nightmare is too much for me. Yes, yes, I have the option of turning off the TV and ignoring the headlines online. I do want to express my sadness for the families that are now suffering such intense loss. I do feel great sympathy, but moreso, an anger on so many levels. I don't really know how to define what I'm feeling. I guess that's it. I've vented.