Songs That Stir #1

I don't know if I'll keep up on this new attempt at an ongoing series of entries, but hey, stranger things have happened.

I'm sure I'm not alone on this, but there are certain songs that stir strange emotions; make me examine my current state; or return me to a simpler, seemingly happier time. It's quite weird that a song can generate such deep feelings. I've always been a softie anyway, but put the right song on; and I'll be blabbering like a baby...usually while I'm driving alone in my car.

The first entry is off of the Pretty in Pink soundtrack. It's a brilliant album; and the film is on my list of top faves of all time. The movie in general takes me back; and every track on the album brings up thoughts of my childhood. This soundtrack was (I believe) the sixth (6th) cassette tape I ever purchased. This album has been with me for over twenty years. On a lovely tangent, I actually kept track of my cassettes when I was younger; in the order I received/purchased them. Perhaps more on that at another time. Anyway; I am sure this was number 6; just behind Prince & the Revolution--Under the Cherry Moon (Parade); Madonna's True Blue; Miami Vice Soundtrack; Tears for Fears--Songs from the Big Chair; and Robert Palmer--Riptide. Lord. Anyway; this whole album does a number on me; but one track standing out currently (I just put this CD into my car--yes, I'm still on CD's; haven't moved into the Ipod generation as of yet--forgive) is "Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want" by The Smiths. About ten years ago; a time when I was in horrible debt; right when I first moved to Chicagoland on my own; and had just rediscovered some old friends, I was listening to this album in my car a great deal; and this song really mirrored (I believed) what was going on w/ my personal life.

Here are the lyrics...

Good times for a change
See, the luck I've had
Can make a good man
Turn bad
So please please please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want
This time
Haven't had a dream in a long time
See, the life I've had
Can make a good man bad
So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Lord knows, it would be the first time
Lord knows, it would be the first time

I was in such a depressive state; mostly due to my finances, no romantic prospects and my lack of direction (strange how cyclical some things clearly are); and this song just seemed to say it all. Take another look @ those lyrics.

Anyway, I've been listening to this one a lot lately. What I find fascinating is how the meaning has changed. I'm coming up on 9 years w/ the other half, so I don't have that worry. I did "get that". But, I'm again financially unstable; and working through some sort of early mid-life crisis. The pending move; the fact that I'm again going to take a day job to make ends meet; still not making a living doing artsy-fartsy stuff...you know; acting, writing and now directing. Ugh.

I don't take as much of the song's lyrics to heart in my current state. I don't swallow the "Lord knows it would be the first time" quite so readily. I have gotten things I've wanted. I've been fortunate in so much. That line is so dark and pessimistic. I'm not back there; thank goodness.

Jesus; what a babbling entry. I'm curious if I'm making any f***ing sense right now.

"Please, please please...Let me, let me, let me...let me get what I want, this time". There's still so much out of life that I want.

That was fascinating.