Wet Blanket

Been a few days since I said anything. The other half is finishing up his second full week of work. I finished my first week, and have today off. I had tomorrow off until an hour ago, when my boss called to ask me to take a shift tomorrow...overtime, so hell yeah, I said yes. I'm still unsure about this job. I like it, but I have a few reservations. I'll hold off from providing details, just in case anyone happens upon this. I think within a couple of more weeks, it'll all be in the past. It's still that "new person" vibe. Most have been accomodating and supportive, but there are others I'm unsure of...harder to read. I'm learning the product pretty well, and I think I'm getting a decent handle on the processes, but still a far cry from 100%. Then again, what am I expecting? It's been 6 actual working days. It's been a weird week, what with two conversations with my boss, a non bus-ride to work, an upsetting, irritating phone call with my mother, and an argument w/ the other half. Although we are now employed, and that money/work worry has sort of been eliminated, I find there are many other things that are hanging over my head, new challenges that arise when the major obstacle has seemingly been overcome. I'm really in a state of "I don't know". Apparently, nothing can make me completely happy, and no amount of stability will erase all of my issues. I know I've had this state of mind, well, basically forever. I always find something to worry about. But, there are many times that I can put it all aside and just be content. I really believe that this past year (I know I keep whining about it--so forgive) has shaken me up more than I thought. I really took a blow on a lot, and I think it's going to take a bit more time to recover...more than usual. My self esteem levels are at an all time low, and I find myself second guessing almost everything. This is different, cuz I've never been THIS neurotic. What the hell?

On a fun note, the other half and I have freebie tickets to Quarantine tonight. I've been wanting to see it since the ads first appeared. It's first come, first served, so I'll see if we actually get in.

Also, the second Presidential debate (did I already mention this?) was as boring as...I don't know, insert cliche here. That is, with the exception of McCain's "That one." comment. What a maroon. Also, McCain/Palin can kiss my ass. This ultra-negative campaigning of the past week is just repugnant. They should be ashamed.

So, our money woes are soon on their way out, and I hope that serves to instill some confidence back into my battered brain. My hope is that in two weeks, when I'm REALLY comfortable at work, everything else will fall into place.

Yeah, work!

BTW, Nicole Ritchie was in the store the other day. Didn't get to meet her, but she was there. She's tiny!