Who is the ULTIMATE 80s Horror Hunk? Second Boner: Rodney Eastman vs. Danny Hassel

It's time for the second battle of 80s horror hunks -- "Freddy's Boys Part One"

But first...

Our opening battle, Chris Sarandon of FRIGHT NIGHT vs. Kevin (Blair) Spirtas of FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 7: THE NEW BLOOD, ended in a tie of all things -- 4 to 4.  So I'll leave voting open on this one, since the winner won't need to be back in the ring for a bit.

And before I make the case for these two delicious dudes, some business.  My original list of 34 horror hunks has been expanded to a total of 40.  Additions were suggested.  Guys were remembered.  Adt'l research was conducted.  So on we merrily (and hungrily) go!

Our second match-up brings together two hotties from the world of A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET.  They both had the chance to face Freddy in two films (and both failed to survive him the second time around).  This is the first of THREE (yes, three boner battles w/ the hunks, now to be known as "Freddy's Boys").  *do you like how I'm even gaying up Freddy for this?

Rodney Eastman, aka "Joey" from A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS and A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4: THE DREAM MASTER is our first contender for this boner battle.  Now, please keep in mind, that when I first saw these fellas and first yearned to sniff their bodies from head to toe, I was myself, but a young lad.  So as "old troll" as my wanting to "hit that" is today, keep in mind that it's coming from 15 year old me...got it?  Well, we get a nice shot of Rodney's bare chest -- post-Freddy's (disguised as that big-titted nurse Marcy) seduction of him).  This is all well and good, as it confirms that his hormones were raging and horny teenagers will do ANYTHING (I should know).  He also wavers on sex addiction (since he KNOWS it's gonna hurt him) in THE DREAM MASTER (Joey, you fell for it twice? -- you really do need some release!)  It makes me remember when David Duchovny -- in real life -- came out about his sex addition, and how it made me believe that I may have a chance.  "That dude will try ANYTHING!"   :)  Anyhoo, Rodney's also boyishly handsome, kinda innocent looking (but he's aged into a far more experienced and mature looker as well).  Now, I'm kinda cheating, by posting a more recent pic of Rodney's body (nice) and then a classic pic from DREAM WARRIORS.


I'm assuming the cut-up torso is a body double, but I'd still like to say to young Joey, "That looks pretty painful.  Would you like me to rub some ointment on those nasty cuts?  Oops, I missed a spot further up.  Let me just massage this life-saving salve into your nipples."  Rodney Eastman, everyone.

Running against Rodney is another NIGHTMARE piece of meat.  Danny Hassel has to be the ultimate hunk of "Freddy's Boys".  Why, he even gets a line in his first Freddy film, A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4: THE DREAM MASTER, when "Debbie" -- Brooke Theiss' character -- dreamily proclaims, "There's Dan Jordan. Mmmm-mmm.  We are talking one major league hunk."  To which "Alice" -- Lisa Wilcox replies, to "Dan Jordan" (Danny Hassel) directly, "You know, you are one major league hunk."  And then Danny Hassel smiles and lifts his eyes (and I melted), tossing back to her, "Thanks Alice."  Oh lord.  My favorite of "Freddy's Boys" is revealed (guess who I'm voting for on this boner?)  We also get a few (but not quite enough) shirtless shots of Mr. Hassel.  I do recall the moment in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 5: THE DREAM CHILD when the gang is hanging out at the pool and Danny is shirtless, his arms under his head, revealing that lovely armpit hair.  I was 15 when THE DREAM CHILD was released...and it was hard not to say to my friends and family how much I LOVED that armpit hair.  But, the closet was where I was...and the stay there would have been far better if Danny had been there with me.

Kismet:  As I'm searching for the perfect Danny Hassel photo, to make his hunky case, I find this fan video on YouTube.  You get both the "Thanks, Alice" AND the "shirtless pool" scene -- IN ACTION!  Check the link out here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fV5m5MY7o9c

You're welcome.  Now, it's time to vote in the first "Freddy's Boys Boner Battle"!  Who will move ahead -- one step closer to being the ULTIMATE 80s Horror Hunk?