Who is the ULTIMATE 80s Horror Hunk? Boner Nine: Jason Beghe vs. Todd Allen

Poor voter turnout for the last battle.  Feeling sad for Paul Kratka and Peter Barton.  Two deserving hunks who were shown very little love.  For shame.  To all of you.  For shame.

However, with our meager THREE votes (again -- for shame) there is still a clear winner, and that winner is Peter Barton -- "Doug" of FRIDAY THE 13TH: THE FINAL CHAPTER.  No doubt that his yummy-nummy jawline and beauty pushed him over the edge.

We're moving into some uber-manly territory for our next battle.  And that battle is entitled "Let the Fur Fly".

We're pitting two hairy-chested hotties against one another, for your love, your lust and your votes!

First up:  Mr. Jason Beghe will be making an appearance in this competition for his role in Romero's MONKEY SHINES.  If you'll recall (have you seen the film?  you should see the film), he plays a paraplegic who must rely on a little monkey to be his hands and feet.  A special bond develops and chaos ensues.  But, we're focusing on the very brief moments before the character's accident.  You see, "Allan" (that's Beghe's character) goes out for a run, but is then hit by a car and the movie takes shape from there.  But prior to this tragedy -- as any good runner would do -- he contorts his body for some revealing runner's stretches.  He's shirtless, bottomless and oh-so flexible.  As a kid, tuning in for non-zombie Romero, I was pleasantly surprised by Romero's handling of this non-dead subject matter, but more-so for his choice to show Beghe's naked ass and Jason's absolutely stunning hairy body.  Check out these photos and you will completely and totally understand why he is worthy of your votes.  Oh, and his face is nothing to sneeze at...unless he kisses you too hard with that luscious stubble and scrunches up your nose with the force of his love.  It could happen.  Jason Beghe and his God-given gift of body fur, everyone.

Beghe's hairy body will take part in a furious boner battle against another king of follicle goodness from 80s horror, Mr. Todd Allen of WITCHBOARD.  "Jim" is the guy who does whatever it takes to make sure his lovely woman and possible baby-mama, "Linda" (Tawny Kitaen) remains free of possessive evil spirits, and will spend lots of that time shirtless, exposing (I'm stealing this line from THE BIRDCAGE) that "thick nest of hair" -- to the delight of young gay horror fans everywhere!  Allen's hot-n-hairy body is played nicely against his boyishly handsome face -- to great boner-inducing effect.  Watching the film as a kid (it was/is one of my favorites), I always had thoughts as "Jim" and estranged best friend "Brandon" (Stephen Nichols -- "Patch" of DAYS OF OUR LIVES fame) were in the hotel on the way to Big Bear to find out what the hell was the deal w/ "David" (the little dead kid in the board), that they might, you know, hook up.  You see, I believed (perhaps when I was much older and could understand and fantasize about such things) that as kids, they experimented with one another.  Neither was gay, but as they grew up (and in the case of "Jim" -- exploded in a cloud of hairy goodness) they discovered the joys of "boys will be boys".  Can't they relive those glory hole days before Brandon meets an untimely death at the hands of the fake "David"?  I mean, would that be asking too much?  What am I supposed to think as Brandon sits there with his shirt hanging open?  If you ask me, Brandon isn't jealous of Jim, he's jealous of Linda.  What say you to that?  I mean, have you seen Jim's hairy chest?  Anyway -- Todd Allen is looking for (and deserving of) your votes.  Let's do this!

My vote (and this is a tough one as I love me some hairy chests) goes to Beghe.  Perhaps if I got a good shot of Allen's ass, he would have a better shot.  But w/ Beghe's fur and his naked butt, he's got the upper hand in this boner battle.

Vote now, folks!